Social Studies

Things I miss about teaching (in no particular order)

2007-01-28T22:27:00.000-05:00

1. Having a reason to get dressed up.
2. Reading interesting historical stories and then telling my students about them.
3. Watching all the teenage drama unfold.
4. The Starbucks gift cards at Christmas.
5. Planning a knock-out observation lesson.
6. My co-workers (well, some of them).
7. When it snowed, I got the day off.

Ellery at 2 months

2007-01-03T22:09:00.000-05:00

I really don't want to abandon the blogging world. Having a newborn at Christmastime kept me really busy but I am hoping I'll catch up in the next couple of weeks. Then I can post more often and visit your blogs. I really do miss reading them. I love my baby girl and am so glad to be able to spend so much time watching her develop. But I didn't realilze how isolating it would be. I still haven't found a good rhythm that would allow me to to get out during the day with her much. And of course the Denver weather does not allow going on walks right now.

Anyway, I hope to catch up with everyone soon. Until then, more pictures will have to suffice (sigh).

Baby it's cold outside

2006-12-01T18:43:00.000-05:00

But I've got my baby girl to keep me warm. Here she is at one-month. I can't believe if I was working my maternity leave would end this week. There's no way I could do it. I miss my students but keeping up with them via email is just fine, thank you very much.

A 2000 word post

2006-11-16T20:45:00.000-05:00

No time to write, but a picture is worth 1000 words right?

I'm sure you will agree this first one needs some explanation. That is my hospital bed. And underneath it? Soil. Texas soil to be exact. Her grandmother provided it so that she could still be born on Texas soil. Get it? The funny thing is that we remebered to put it there (I was sure we wouldn't) but forgot to take it out. I can't imagine what the cleaning crew thought.

Her debut

2006-11-02T20:38:00.000-05:00

Did you know...

2006-10-26T10:47:00.000-04:00

That only 5% of babies are born on their due dates?

Guess that makes our baby girl pretty darn special. But we already knew that.

I went into labor Saturday night while watching the World Series. Sunday morning at 9:04 our precious baby, Ellery, was born weighing 7 pounds and measuring 19 inches.

She's perfect.

Isn't that what kindergarten is for?

2006-10-18T23:18:00.000-04:00

No baby yet. We're still here. Doc doesn't think it will be too much longer because the baby is very low, I'm 3 cm and 80% effaced.

Anyway, in the meantime, I DO have something important to say. Here in Denver it is election time. (I think this is why the baby is taking its time -- it doesn't want to see all the negative ads).

One of the ballot issues will raise taxes to support preschool. I'll be honest and say that I don't know all the details, but overall the point is to expand preschool programs. I've got a couple of problems with this:

1. Denver taxes are already really high, but their k-12 per pupil spending ranks very low in the nation. If k-12 education isn't really working (and as an educator I'll be the first to admit that there are LOTS of problems) then do we really want to EXPAND the system's responsibilities?

2. The tv commercial they keep running over and over to support the issue features a teacher complaining that her kindergartners come to class unprepared to learn. Um, isn't that what kindergarten is for? Well, at least it used to be. Now we have these full day programs that stress the students out. No matter how young you start, there will ALWAYS been some children who are behind others. That's because parents don't do their jobs or are too overwhelmed by the challenges of raising a child.

3. It's a slippery slope. I haven't read anything on it in a while, but I know a few years ago the Bush administration was pushing for standardized testing of the 3- and 4-year olds in Head Start. I am afraid uniform preschool will lead to testing of our youngest citizens, when they are supposed to be learning to PLAY and IMAGINE -- something standardized tests woefully lack. I don't think we should be putting so much pressure on toddlers.

Hmm...So maybe I'm not so much into blogging anymore

2006-10-09T14:14:00.000-04:00

I can't quite bring myself to end the blog. What if I have something really important to say? But the truth is right now I have something really important to DO, and that's grow a baby.

Anyway, I thought I would check in if anyone out there is concerned. We're less than two weeks from the due date. Last week we went in and had an external version. Basically, the baby was breech. So a resident and an OB squeezed my stomach really hard and flipped the baby around.

Now we wait.

That's my baby!

2006-09-12T11:23:00.000-04:00

Would you like to see my baby dance? Now, if he would just dance on down to the head-down position, I would feel much better.

You love me, you really love me!

2006-09-09T15:06:00.000-04:00

Well it's obvious my former students miss me. I know they do because they are all emailing me now. Their letters are very similiar. They read something like this:

Dear Mrs. Abigail,
Hi. How are you? How is Denver? I hope you are getting settled in. How is the baby? Well, thanks to you I got a [3,4, or 5] on the AP exam. Thank you for teaching me!

Also, I was wondering, if you aren't too busy, would you be willing to write me a letter of recommendation?

Sincerely [or some other awkward closing],
former student

Really, I don't mind it. I had assured them before I left that I would help with the recommendations. It's a small way for me to stay connected with students and they are great kids so I'm glad to help. The only problem is that I am having terrible pregnancy induced carpal tunnel (turns out it is a real ailment) so typing isn't so much fun right now. But if I work a little at a time I think I should be able to manage it.

Back to what?

2006-09-03T20:51:00.000-04:00

So, everyone is back to school now, both here in Colorado and back in Maryland. Except for me, for the first time since I was 5.

It's weird.

And sad.

And great.

Two Rocky Experiences

2006-08-09T16:48:00.000-04:00

As said below, we have settled in here in Denver with few major problems. It's a little warmer than I hoped, but all-in-all it's what I expected.

The experience at the Drivers License Office was about what I expected too, and that's not good. We started with an hour and a half wait. Ugh. Not horrible compared to our experiences in other states, but nonetheless not fun when you are 6 1/2 months pregnant and the building isn't air conditioned. There was only one person doing line #1, which I think was for everyone who didn't need to take a driving test to get their license. I always hate when there's just one person, because you know that 25% of the people in line have some "issue" that will need to be taken care of so that the line movement just comes to a halt. And when that ONE special person had to go to the bathroom? Well, we all waited.

But that wasn't the best part. I went first and had no trouble. My husband was behind me. When the guy pulled up my hubby's record he told him that Alabama had placed a block on his drivers license. Huh? My husband? The one time preacher, now professor? From Texas and Maryland, but never even lived in Alabama? I was standing there when my husband asked "are you sure?" for the millionth time and the worker informed him that it was the exact same name and birthdate. We were given a number to call with the Alabama DOT. So now, we had to deal with TWO state bureaucracies in one day. Seriously folks.

So of course, poor hubby had a tough time getting through to the people in Alabama. It didn't help that when he finally talked to a real person she told him to call a number that didn't even work. Finally, after about an hour my husband got through to someone that informed him that yes, he lived at so-and-so lane and he had an outstanding something-or-other. NOT.GOOD. Of course the first thing that comes to our mind is identity theft. So he was transferred to someone else within the Alabama system that was supposed to be able to help. Boy did she. If by help you mean that she pointed out that the person in question had a different middle name and date of birth. Sure the first and last names were the same and the birth months and years, but there is some crucial info out of whack here people. My husband doesn't have a name that is all that common. You would expect that this kind of thing happens to John Smiths all the time and that the bureaucrats would know to look at all the relevant information.

So back up to the drivers license office he went, where he was spared the burden of another hour and a half wait and instead was sent straight to the front of the line. A different person was working and when he pulled up the record -- I kid you not -- asked my husband if he had ever worked in Alabama. This time my hubby insisted they look at ALL the information before being refused a license. Sheesh.

We did do the emissions tests today without any trouble but we have put off the car registration until we get our nerve back up.

*******
Now, for our other experience. The Barnes and Noble on Colorado Blvd. Don't do it on a Friday night. Good grief, it was like a frat mixer in that place. My husband and I are big bookstore people. That's what we do on Friday nights for -gasp- FUN. A little coffee, a little browsing, and an occassional purchase. Now, don't worry Mr. Lady, we are well aware of The Tattered Cover and its glory. But it isn't very close, so we thought we'd try the local Barnes and Noble. I have never seen so many people hanging out. That isn't particularly B&N's fault. What I fault them for is their lack of accomodating that many people. Because the Starbucks is separate from the bookstore, you can't go in there unless you have purchased the books you have in your hand. If you're just thumbing through them you are banished to one very small section of the bookstore. It was quite some time before a chair even opened up, and even when it did, it felt kind of like I was in Time Out. There just weren't many comfortable places to hang out in the store.

So boo on them (though I did finally find a Peter Rabbit baby memory book!). Looks like we'll be making the trek to Tattered Cover for our coffee and book fix (not that we'll be doing much of that in a few months anyway).

*******
Okay, I recognize that again maybe this post isn't so interesting to non-Denverites. Don't worry though; I've been reading Jonathan Kozol so I'll have plenty more education related food for thought soon.

Knock Knock

2006-08-05T10:04:00.000-04:00

It sounds like a bad joke -- how do you get a history professor, a pregnant woman, and a cat who hates cars halfway across the country?

But there's no punch line. We did it. And all in all, it wasn't too bad.

We are in Colorado now. My husband, parents, and cat arrived a week ago Thursday. They drove a 22ft Penske towing one car and our other 4-door Honda out here in about 2 1/2 days. Me? It took me about 3 1/2 hours. I flew out on Friday because pregnant women aren't supposed to sit in the car for more than a few hours at a time. Really dodged a bullet eh?

First impressions? Our home is what would be called "charming" or "cozy" in a newspaper ad. I mean that it is smaller than anyplace we've lived, but very cute. The outside could use some work, but as renters, we're reluctant to do things that cost much money. We do have a basement though! People that grew up on the Texas Gulf Coast don't get to experience these, so this is a first. I love it! The basement is as large as the rest of the place and I have quickly learned that having a basement means you get to keep lots of crap but not worry about where it will go or if you want it on display. Very nice.

My other impression is that it is a little warmer than I would like. The days we were actually moving in there were record or near-record highs. Of course us Texas girls are used to just cranking up the AC. No central AC here though. Just a window unit that makes lots of noise. But still, we've discovered it works pretty well when you get desperate.

That's the basic summary. Next up: an evaluation of the Colorado DMV and the local Barnes and Noble.

I'm glad the Bachelors in Political Science has paid off

2006-07-20T12:05:00.000-04:00

You Passed the US Citizenship Test

Congratulations - you got 10 out of 10 correct!

Could You Pass the US Citizenship Test?

The scores - 2nd edition

2006-07-18T16:07:00.000-04:00

Okay, I have the real scores now. 86% of my students passed. I am pleased with that. The school average on all AP exams is 82% so I beat that, and with many students who had never taken an AP or GT course before.

The breakdown:
6 2's (14%)
15 3's (34%)
14 4's (32%)
8 5's (18%)

If I was teaching next year (which I am NOT) my next goal would be to get the passing scores up. In other words, I'd like to see fewer 3's and more 4's and 5's. In fact, my passing rate was not too far off the more experienced teacher I was working with but the most significant difference was that his passing scores were higher.

Overall, I am certainly pleased and relieved. I worked hard for this and so did the kids. In fact, there is only one student that I can say worked really hard and did not pass. That probably means more than anything.

The AP scores are in

2006-07-15T11:35:00.000-04:00

And so far I have a 100 percent pass rate.*

*My school hasn't sent me the scores yet, but 2 of my 55 students emailed me to tell me they got 4's. Gosh I love statistics!

That dark secret in your closet

2006-07-07T20:25:00.000-04:00

Well I obviously survived both plane rides just fine, and with few nerves at all. We have returned from our vacation and now the preparations for the cross-country move of all our belongings, a pregnant woman, and a cat who hates cars begins. Which brings me to a crucial question...

What do you do with all the cases to your cd's? We keep our cd's in those Case Logic holders so we have zillions of empty cd cases with the little inserts. They take up an awful lot of space, but one day I might, just might need them. Throwing them out seems risky but keeping them seems like a waste of space.

Suggestions?

Dear airline companies:

2006-06-21T17:16:00.000-04:00

When a pregnant lady calls to find out why, even hours before her flight leaves, you already have it marked as departing two hours late, please don't tell her it is because of maintenance repairs. Even if it is. It is okay to lie sometimes. Thanks.

p.s. This is especially important if said pregnant lady used to take valium in order to fly. Even though she has managed without it for the last couple of years, she likes to carry it with her and tell herself she can take it if necessary and she can not do that when she is pregnant. So yeah, just lie.

We're moving

2006-06-18T23:11:00.000-04:00

This is the face of a $1200 cat.

You might be thinking, hey that really looks like a $40 cat one would get at the Humane Society.

That is true. And since we got this cute thing a few years ago, she has taken very little maintenance. Food, a bed, scratching posts and toilet paper rolls is really all it has taken.

Then my dear husband went to Denver to find us a place to live. And he found us the perfect little duplex (near Harvard Gulch for you Colorado residents). It was cheap and had most of the amenities we were looking for. AND, it had a strict no pets policy. What to do? Abandon our darling Shea (pronounced Shay)? No way! My husband negotiated instead. We're paying an extra 100 pet deposit plus 100 a month. So now she's a $1200 cat.

Before you try to commit us to the insane asylum for cat people, keep in mind that even with the added rent, the place we found was still $150 cheaper than our second choice, so not a bad deal all-in-all.

And it was over...just like that

2006-06-13T19:30:00.000-04:00

Schooooooooooolllllll's out for SUMMER!

What now?

Letter to my 1st Period

2006-06-07T19:52:00.000-04:00

To my bright-eyed, eager learners of 1st Period:

182 class periods, 12 units with corresponding exams and essays, nearly 1000 pages of text, even more pages of notes, one giant exam, a few random comments from K- and many strange stories from P-…but we all survived and lived to tell about it. Come July, you will get your scores on the AP exam and then supposedly we’ll all know how much we really learned. Even before the scores come in, though, I can say the year has been a worthwhile and enjoyable learning experience for me.

Thank you all for such an incredible year. Thank you for staying awake, for asking great questions, for fixing my staplers. Most of all, thank you for giving it your best. I know that other interests and challenges in your life pull you in a thousand different directions, but for forty-five minutes a day you (mostly) focused on U.S. History. It is students like you that give hope to cynics like me, because it is obvious you see the ways our country can be improved and you have the potential to do it.

And, of course, thank you for the Trader Joe’s gift card. I promise to try to buy some healthy snacks in addition to the several boxes of chocolate Joe-Joe’s I am bound to pick up. It was sweet of you to do that, and I will think of you all summer while I munch on my snacks!

I wish you all the best of luck next year in your senior year and in the amazing years that are bound to follow!

Mrs. Abigail

Letter to my 7th Period

2006-06-07T19:49:00.000-04:00

To my most favorite seventh period class of the year:

Thank you all so much for the wonderful shower/party/Wild Wild West viewing/escape from typical class. It was so sweet and thoughtful of all of you to arrange it. I am pretty sure I am the only woman in the world to get to watch a Will Smith movie at her baby shower. The cake, cookies, and sodas made it even more enjoyable.

Of course, I love all of the baby gifts as well. I will be sure to send pictures of little Publius in the cute outfits. And years later I will tell the baby all about your class when we look at the Dr. Seuss frame or read the book together. (Actually I expect the baby to be reading the book to me by at least eleven months.)

Please know that I recognize how fortunate I am to have worked with such a great group of students. You have made the year manageable, (hey – maybe even enjoyable) with your curiosity, flexibility, and humor. I am so glad to have had the experience of working with you and I will take many great memories with me to Denver. The shower and gifts simply add to what was already an incredible year. Thank you so much!

Mrs. Abigail
{editor's note: Publius is our class name for the baby...long story}

It's time for Abigail's annual "did you know I teach in an un-airconditioned, windowless room?" whine post

2006-05-30T20:43:00.000-04:00

Recipe for exhaustion:

1. It is 93 degrees
2. The building was locked up during the three day weekend
3. I have no air conditiong
4. I have no windows
5. I had to get through two world wars in World History
6. I am pregnant

Most days lately I have been pretty sentimental and sad about leaving my school, and teaching in general. Today was not one of those days. My next job will be at an OSHA-approved workplace.

No such thing as a stupid question

2006-05-17T19:49:00.000-04:00

I have three Gifted and Talented World History sections. You can always tell the differece in ability on test day. No, I don't mean by looking at the test average (though you can tell from that too). You can tell just by the questions they ask DURING the test.

From my 1st section, not a peep. They did not ask a single question during the entire test. From my second section, here is a list of questions asked during today's test:

What does annex mean? (asked twice by two different students within minutes of each other, mispronounced both times)

What is a bottleneck? (asked twice by two different students)

What do you mean by labor relations?

What do you mean by western nations? (asked twice by the same student)

What do you mean by modernization? (asked twice by two different students)

Where do we put the test when we're finished (not only had I told them specifically at the beginning of class what they should do, but we have had the exact same procedure all year long. It has never changed.)

I shouldn't complain. This is what I get paid to do. I just mean to point out that I think there is a great difference in student knowledge and in ability to use context clues and elimination. Incidentally, when my 11th grade AP students take a test, I refuse to clarify questions or terms for them since they can't ask for help on the AP exam. Sometimes the wording on the AP exam includes some sophisticated vocabulary, but I don't mind. If they are consistently reading their textbooks and outside reading, they should be learning new words all the time. Where do people get the idea that reading skills are only important in English?

Okay, this has taken a detour quickly so I'll wrap up here.

AP Exam recap

2006-05-10T18:34:00.000-04:00

Ms. Cornelius, from A Shrewdness of Apes asked how I thought the exam was. That's a fair question since I've been discussing it all year.

I saw the possibilities on a continuum. On the most disastrous end, students could come in and say that I had never taught them the things on the essays and multiple choice. On the perfection end, students would come in and say that the essays were exactly what we had practiced the day before the exam.

What I was realistically hoping for was somewhere in the middle, and that is what I got. ALL of the essays topics were topics I had covered at some point during the year. Most of it we had not specifically reviewed, but the reviewing is mostly up to the kids. So, basically, I had done my job.

A bonus was that two days before the exam we reviewed the term "republican motherhood," which was a major component of the DBQ (23 percent of the grade for you non-AP people). Also, at an afterschool review session the day before the exam we practiced a question on Harding and Coolidge. For the 12 kids that were there, the question on Progressivism in the 20's was perfect.

The one thing I am pretty upset about is that 8 or so of my 55 students wrote about hippies and counterculture in the 1950's. I was really surprised by how much they confused the 50's with the 60's. One even wrote about the Miss America pageant of 58.

But there's nothing I (or they) can do about it now. For the most part, I am pleased. I think I got all a first timer could ask for.

I don't need this right now

2006-05-03T18:36:00.000-04:00

So today I get a phone call from a parent. She wants to schedule an appointment to check on how her son is doing and talk about how to prepare for the final. She would like to meet this week or early next week. I explained to her I couldn't meet this week because I have AP review sessions every afternoon, but I could certainly meet next week. I asked if she was aware next Wednesday was offical Parent Conference night -- when teachers stay at school until 6pm for the exclusive purpose of meeting with parents. She said no, but she really needed to meet earlier -- either Monday or Tuesday -- because she wants to get a leg up on preparing for the final.

Sigh.

Fine. I will meet with her on Monday, my first day WITHOUT an AP review session in I don't know how long. And I really hope those two days make a big difference.

But I'm not finished. I mentioned to this mother that it would be good for us to meet because her son is failing right now because of 4 zeros. The mother then informs me that he has a 504 plan (except she kept calling it a lesson plan) for his ADHD and it says anytime he has a 0 I am supposed to contact her so her son can make it up. I explained to her that in Gifted and Talented classes I do not take late work. But she said that his 504 plan says I have to. Not having the 504 plan right in front of me, I told her I would look into it.

After I got off the phone with her I pulled his 504 plan out of the filing cabinet. It says "additional time for assignments as needed." I do not interpret this to mean the student can turn in assignments halfway through the quarter. What this means to me is that if he can't finish a test in time, he comes to me, asks for more time, and I let him. OR, if he doesn't finish his map on time, I let him finish it at home. As it is two of the zeros are for class assignments that ALL students could finish at home, but he still did not turn in. The other two zeros are for homework assignments. Again, he had unlimited time to finish it that night. Am I supposed to give him unlimited time ALL QUARTER long when the student did not indicate to me he even had trouble with an assignment?

I try to remove from this argument the fact that the student is in a GIFTED and TALENTED class. I assume I have to accomodate his disability no matter what class he is in, but I am tempted to point out that it is a GT class and if he can't handle turning papers in because of his disability, perhaps he should have taken a different course.

T Minus Four

2006-05-01T18:40:00.000-04:00

So, this is the week. We have had a countdown on my board since early March, and here we are. There is no turning back time and there is very little to do with the dwindling minutes I have left.

My students take the Advanced Placement US exam on Friday at 8am.

I have worked harder for this class than any other class in my (albeit short) teaching career. I spent my summer reading up on the parts of history less familiar and getting up early for classes that were supposed to help me become a better AP teacher. I spent my weekends grading. I spent my weekday evenings planning discussions. I spent my planning period reading more history. I spent time at school social events seeking advice from my AP mentor. I spent my nights laying awake wondering if I should have skipped that one small factoid for the sake of time. I spent my sick days teaching. I spent my money on US history books and resources for them. I spent THIS YEAR on THIS CLASS.

I gave it my best. I really did. There are things I would like to have done better, and there are additional things I would have liked to have done IF I HAD THE TIME. But I tell you, I did the absolute best I could with the students and the time I had. I wish I could say my students have given it their very best. But I'm not sure I can. Some of them really have given it their all, but many have disappointed me in their lack of priorities. But still, I love them. The first time I cried at the prospect of moving halfway across the country, it wasn't at the thought of leaving friends, but at leaving my students and missing their senior year. Many of these students I have actually taught for two years in a row. We have had great laughs, great debates, great heart-to-hearts.

If that isn't a successful year, I don't know what is.

But here's the catch: Come July, come Friday, even, none of that will matter. Success will be measured by one thing -- how many of my students passed the exam? And it's pathetic really, because I am the only one that will let this year be measured by a number. My department head has already said it is my first year, and no one is looking for a certain number. My AP mentor, who has been presented with awards from the College Board for his success, has even said I have done my best and that is all I can hope for. And for goodness sakes, I won't even be teaching here next year -- there's no reputation to worry about.

In the end, it will be my choice to let the test results shape how I view this year. If I was a bigger person, I would look at what I accmplished already and not even glance at the test results. Or maybe it isn't really my fault? Isn't it my principal, isn't it my school board, isn't it my governor, and isn't it my president, who have said that numbers DO matter? That it is what is on the scantron, not on the heart that matters in teaching?

I hope that despite my own numbers driven measure of success, my students will see beyond their grade. I hope they know I value them for who they are and what they taught me, not how well they score on Friday. If that is the case, then how can I say I have failed?

What was that noise?

2006-04-27T18:57:00.000-04:00

If at about 1:25 eastern time you heard a shrill noise or felt a disturbance in the force, it was my fault. It was the sound of my 7th period finding out I was pregnant. 15 highly mature but always very intersted in my personal life girls shrieking with joy.

My plan had been to wait until after the AP exam, or at least until after my next doctor appointment this coming Monday. But alas, the belly gave me away. It just seems to have popped over Spring Break and it's been very hard to hide.

So today, there was all kind of excited chit chat going on in the corner during 4th period. It was coming from a boy mostly. Finally I overheard him say, "I just want to know! I can't stand it!"

I said "Joe, what is your problem?"

"Nothing. Nothing, Mrs. Abigail," he says.

"Just out with it Joe."

"Are you pregnant?"

At this point, I should have made him sweat. I should have looked hurt. Should have said something about eating too much pizza over the weekend. Instead I just smiled and said yes. After the celebration, I kindly informed Joe that he should NEVER EVER ask a woman that unless he is 100% sure of the answer because he had just basically called me fat. But it was cute nonetheless.

So, for the rest of the day I just told my classes because it was weird for one class to know and not the others. I still have 1st and 2nd period tomorrow, but I'm going to guess they will have already heard when they get there.

13 weeks, 3 days, and counting

2006-04-19T16:09:00.000-04:00

I have the best blogging audience ever. Know why? Because you totally took my cue on the "don't ask, don't tell" IVF policy. Thanks a zillion.

Anyway, I am so friggin thrilled to announce that I am in fact pregnant -- and even into my second trimester.

Along the way I have had ultrasounds at 5 weeks 4 days, 7 weeks 1 day, and 8 weeks 4 days along with a heartbeat doppler check at 11 weeks, 4 days. Every time things looked fine. None of this has actually kept me from worrying.

And, because, like polite people, you will also ask how I feel: I feel pretty good. I haven't puked a single time. I have been totally exhausted and the digestive system has been on a strike, but otherwise I've been pretty lucky (which really was just another reason for me to worry throughout the 1st trimester).

Could you hear the sigh of relief where you were?

2006-04-08T08:08:00.000-04:00

WWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
HHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Spring Break is here!

Finally!

I slept in until 7 am this morning. It's the best I could do. Tonight we are headed to Denver on a fact finding mission. We'll be looking for a place to live, but are assuming it will take at least a second trip, especially since we still haven't nailed down if we are buying or renting.

Then on Wednesday we will fly to Houston to be with my family over Easter.

I will not grade papers. I will not plan lessons. I might not even read a history book.

One of zillions I am sure

2006-03-30T20:50:00.000-05:00

I have seen several reviews of NBC's Teachers by teaching bloggers, but I'll throw in my two cents anyway:

1. It comes on at 9:30 here on the east coast. Obviously they aren't interested in teachers actually watching the show because surely they know we are in bed by then.

2. It wasn't funny.

Yep. That about sums it up.

Why it's sometimes not convenient to live where you work

2006-03-19T18:27:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it took me this long to blog about this. Last week one of my top ten teaching fears came true...

I have not been in a Victoria's Secret in years, probably about five years actually. We boycotted them after their commercials and prime time "modeling" shows got out of hand. But I was desperate and my normal bargain undies place had nothing to offer.

So I headed to VS to see if they still had the 5 for 25 deal I remembered from so long ago. They did. And I spent a long time picking out the exact five I wanted. Then, I headed to the front of the store where the cashier was. As I scanned the store, there she was...one of the students from my 7th period class. I'm not sure if I was more afraid of her seeing me with my undies or me seeing what she had picked out. That is an image I try to avoid, despite the trendy best efforts of all my students to show off their favorite hot pink thongs under their low-rise jeans.

I turned back around, set my selections on a counter and headed out the side entrance to the VS bath and body section. I didn't go back. I got a 3 pack on sale at Target yesterday.

That's DOCTOR Mrs. Abigail to you!

2006-03-17T19:12:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone guess what! My hubby defended his dissertation today and passed. Rumor has it that it went very well. So he is totally finished with his degree. I am no longer a dissertation widow.

If it feels this good to me, I can't imagine how good it feels to him.

If anyone needs me tonight, I'll be partyin' down. (And by partyin' I mean eating pizza and watching basketball here at our place with a bunch of other history students.)

I'm so glad I'm outta there!

2006-03-08T19:55:00.000-05:00

There is so much going on at school right now I don't know where to begin. Actually, I know exactly what I'd like to say but just don't have the time. What else is new?

Here's a quick wrap-up

The district office of Social Studies has decided that all 27 high schools will test for each unit of Government on the exact same day. And the test will be provided by the district -- no modifications for inclusion or Honors classes. Teachers will no longer teach the curriculum in the order they see best fit (doing electoral politics in October/November during presidential election years and March during local election years, etc.) Teachers will be required to provide an individual class breakdown of how many students missed each individual question to the department head, who reports it to the principal, who reports it to the district office. For me, among a zillion other unintended consequences, I think it is bad for teacher retention. People don't become teachers to work in an assembly line. They become teachers because they think they have good ideas about how to teach. But No Child Left Behind is making that impossible.

Also, starting next year, about a third of the freshman class will have, in addition to their English class, TWO periods of reading. This means for many of the average and low performing students their schedule will be as follows:
2 periods of Algebra (implemented this year)
3 periods of English
1 of Government
1 of Biology

That's it. No P.E. No music. No band. No art. No foreign language.

I absolutely agree we need to do something about reading. But how much is a kid going to learn in 7th period when the only break he has had all day is 25 minutes at lunch. Frankly, I wouldn't be able to stay on task that long.

I got tagged

2006-02-26T18:25:00.000-05:00

Tonight it is all about me. Polski tagged me for a 4 things meme.

Four Jobs I’ve Had
Sports reporter
Babysitter
Chuck E. Cheese kidcheck
Teacher

Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over
Napoleon Dynamite
Ever After
Monsters, Inc
The Christmas Story

Four Places I’ve Lived

Houston, Texas
College Station, Texas
Baltimore, Maryland (gasp, she reveals her location)
Soon I can add Denver, Colorado

Four TV Shows I Love
West Wing
How I Met Your Mother
Gilmore Girls
Uh, I don't have cable. That's all I can come up with.

Four Places I’ve Vacationed
Canada
Italy (well, that was actually for "study")
Chincoteague Island
New Braunfels, Texas (EVERY YEAR)

Four Places YOU want to visit/vacation to
I want to take a cruise around Greece
Outer Banks, NC
I want to go back to Canada for a second honeymoon without a cold
One of those all-inclusive tropical places

Four of My Favorite Foods
Fettucini
Margerita Pizza
Freebirds Burritos
Ice cream

Four Blogs I Visit Daily ( or at least places on-line )
www.tcoyf.com (a site for women that want to get pregnant, don't want to get pregnant, can't get pregnant, are pregnant, were pregnant, etc)

www.weatherchannel.com

As far as blogs, I use bloglines. I visit when you update or when I get time.

Four Places I’d Rather Be Right Now
Torino
Someplace where it's Saturday, not Sunday
In Texas with my family
At a ski resort in the mountains

Go West Young Man!

2006-02-20T20:11:00.000-05:00

(Actually, either way we were going west so the title doesn't make much sense.)

So, a LOT has been going on here. I wouldn't even know where to begin. The part I care to share now is that we are moving. We have made our decision.

Shannon, here we come! We are moving to Denver! I thought it would be terribly painful to pass up the opportunity to go back to Texas but it isn't. We decided that the job in Colorado was too great to pass up. It took us over two weeks to come to that decision but I don't regret it. When it was snowing the other day I realized I'm not yet sick of snow and four seasons.

I know few other details. My hubby will defend the dissertation next month and we'll start to worry about everything else after that. For now, we don't know where we will live, if we will buy a house, or even if I am going to work next year. That, obviously, is a whole separate blog post, but I can say right now that even though things are going well, I am very burned out and not sure I want to start over in a new school.

All right, the Olympics call... I'll try to make the rounds to all your blogs soon!

Can't wait to see the Google hits on this one

2006-02-11T16:28:00.000-05:00

So far, my student teacher is not spectacular. But he has already earned his keep because he caught this typo on my AP Exam

The above illustration of a Horatio Alger novel depicts which of the ideals his stories often supported

(d) To get head in America, it's not what you know, but who you know.

Luckily there was still time to fix and run off fresh packets. Handwriting the 'a' in would have just made the mistake even more obvious.

A not-so-typical month here

2006-02-05T17:32:00.000-05:00

What's going on in my life? Well, thanks for asking.

1. The student teacher started this past week. This was nearly a month before I was TOLD he would start. I was TOLD incorrectly. I think he's going to be okay, but it's really too soon to tell. He teaches his first lesson tomorrow.

2. I have officially finished my first IVF cycle. Now we wait.

3. DH has gotten two job offers. One is close to family, but at an average school in rural Texas. The other is in Colorado (which is honestly, a state I THINK I would like) at a good school, but close to no one that we know. We have to decide by this Friday. We will spend a half hour deciding where to eat dinner, people. Decisions are not our thing. I can honestly say that this is excruitiating. I hate it. And instead of focusing on the fact that he's got two tenure-track offers and all those great things, I feel like I am in a lose-lose situation.

4. We will begin AP review sessions in the next few weeks.

5. The cat has officially been living with us four years this month. We got her during the 2002 Olympics. She is named after one of the skeleton athletes -- Shea.

AP Review ideas

2006-01-22T09:55:00.000-05:00

Wow, I didn't realize how many of my blogging peers were teaching AP history courses. Thanks so much for your comments the last few days. There are two of us that teach AP US at my school and we have started discussing review sessions. My colleague has always started in mid-February with after-school sessions going over practice exams. He also encourages the kids to form official study groups that meet outside of school. This year we are thinking of doing that as well, but maybe going over the past unit exams in the sessions after school. (We never go over them in class because there just isn't time.)

So, do any of you have tried and true ways you would recommend for getting the kids ready for the actual exam?

*************
For those of you following my IVF cycle, I am in the real "meat" of the cycle now -- called stimming. I go to the clinic at 6:30 for bloodwork and an sometimes an ultrasound, give myself a shot then head to school. Afterschool I check my personal voicemail account they gave me for bloodwork results. Then at 5:30 I do two more shots. The belly is getting pretty sore and my arms are getting bruised. Before I started stimming they found a small cyst on my ovary. It was nothing major but you can't stim with it there so they aspirated it. Not fun. At all.

I way overresponded to the stim medication so they have cut my dosage in half. Hopefully that will get things on track because if not things can get dangerous and they have to cancel your cycle.

Cleaning is underrated

2006-01-14T22:24:00.000-05:00

I spent almost all day cleaning and putting away the Christmas decorations. And you know what? It felt soooooo good. Sometimes cleaning is the best stress reliever.

Now, on to my next stress reliever: My hubby bought cookies and cream ice cream last night. It is incredibly windy tonight. Sometimes when it is windy our power goes out. So I better eat the ice cream or it could go to waste. (And hey, if it goes to WAIST instead -- more fat means my subcutaneous injections hurt less.) Just call me the queen of rationalizations!

What a waste of a perfectly good Friday

2006-01-13T16:01:00.000-05:00

My AP students took their Civil War and Reconstruction test today and the scores were bad. Bad. Bad. Bad. Bad. I don't think I'll have an A average left after I enter the grades. Well, I guess it should be a nice little wake-up call as we hit the mid-year slump.

It would have been easier to take had I not found out my IVF cycle is being delayed because of a cyst.

This should be interesting

2006-01-11T18:43:00.000-05:00

My department head approached me today and asked if I would take a student teacher for 6 weeks in February and March. I was immediately flattered by it, especially since I have only been teaching about three years. Otherwise I have mixed feelings about it. Basically, if the intern turns out to be good, well I think it's a good idea. And if the intern turns out to be bad, well then it was a bad idea. Either way, I guess I am attracted to the idea of leaving a mark in a different way. I shape students every day, but this is an opportunity to touch students I might never meet.

There are less than 4 months until the AP Exam

2006-01-09T21:04:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I am already more than halfway to the AP US exam. Content-wise, I am just now halfway there though. We test on Reconstruction this week.

Most of the time things hum along with me crunching every night to have notes together. We have good discussions during class. Next day, repeat. So, about 90% of the time I am fine because I too wrapped up in the cycle. But every once in a while I have a total panic attack. I see something on a practice test that I didn't teach or the other AP teacher refers to a topic I don't know much about, etc etc. And suddenly I am flooded with fear. What if none of my students pass the exam?

These feelings are common I know. Dh has dealt with the same issues. Some days you just feel like a total fraud and fear it is just a matter time before you get found out. But it passes, thankfully.

The Birds and the Bees

2006-01-06T18:40:00.000-05:00

Welcome to the Facts of Life, new millenium style.

By the way, this is literally thousands of dollars worth of meds. Fortunately, we have the best insurance plan I've heard of. All of it cost us $83.

Education lingo

2006-01-05T16:08:00.000-05:00

Re-accreditation: less teaching, more meetings

Higher standards: less teaching, more bubbling

Course registration time: less teaching, more talking about teaching

Anyone have others?

This Christmas stuff sucks the life right outta ya

2005-12-21T18:02:00.000-05:00

It seems there is a wide variety of Christmas vacation lengths for teachers around the US. My niece has been off since last Friday. Our district on the other hand, will go right up until this Friday the 23rd. We return on Tuesday January 3rd, which is actually a gift because before widespread outrage we were returning on Monday, January 2nd.

It is weeks like this that I feel our board of education just doesn't care about me as a person or my sanity at all. I cannot take a long lunch to go get gifts. So, I am stuck trying to get all of the usual holiday stuff done while juggling full time teaching. I can't put anything off until school lets out because that is too late. PLUS, let's face it, teaching is twice as hard on weeks like this. The kids don't want to be there. But we get these lovely memos from higher-ups reminding us that the children should be "fully engaged" in learning activity right up until the final bell on Friday. This is despite the fact that by Friday about 50% of the students are gone and those that are left are carolling in their band and choir classes.

I've learned my lessons the past few years and this year I am taking Friday off and will fly to Texas tomorrow night. We have to get special permission to miss the day before a holiday. But no one gave me any crap about it and I pity the fool that tries.

On a more warming note:
One of the reasons I am pulling my hair out this season is because I have an added responsibility. We have a student at our school with cancer. She is unlike many of our students in that she is from a family living just above poverty. Anyway, my little Teachers Bible Study group adopted the family for Christmas. I ended up divvying up the responsibilities. The Young Life and FCA bought presents for the senior student and the teachers bought gifts for her younger sister. I was the one in charge of actually collecting the money and buying the gifts. Well, it just warmed my heart to see how much generosity is out there. Even though times are tough for a lot of people right now, so many people gave so much. THAT was really cool.

So anyway, I head to Texas tomorrow night. We'll return on Monday the 2nd and on Tuesday the 3rd I go to my IVF injections class. I am strangely excited about it.

All dressed up with no one to teach

2005-12-13T19:45:00.000-05:00

I was officially tenured last February so now I only have two observations a year. Today was my first of the year. Our observations tend to be like pep rallies. They tell us a few things to work on but are overall very positive. Still, it had been a while since I had been observed and this would be my first one for an AP class. So I was a tad nervous, but not much. Our observations include the principal, asst principal, and department head. Well, the principal had a meeting and the asst principal was sick, so it was just my 20 students (I know I know -- so lucky), my department chair, and me. It was a relief but also a little dissappointing. I spent so much time preparing the lesson and then there was no one to really enjoy it.

Well, it was fine anyway. The kids did well and the department head learned a thing or two.

Conversations

2005-12-02T22:59:00.000-05:00

A Conversation you DON'T want to have when your birthday is 3 days away (and you're feeling a little old already):

Me: Okay class, what else can we add to our chart for characteristics of Daoism?

Student: Daoists said that life is sweet.

Me: Yes, they did. So did Natalie Merchant.

Class: blank stares

Me: You know who Natalie Merchant is right?

Class: uhhhhh....

Me: The singer?! "Oh they tell you life is hard, misery from the start, it's dull, it's painful. But I tell you life is sweet." Surely you have heard it.

Class: uhhhh...

(I march over to IPod and turn the song on.)

Student: Oh I think I've heard this. My mom listens to it.

A Conversation you DO want to have when your birthday is three days away:

Fellow teacher: It is supposed to snow in three days.

Me: Really?

Fellow teacher: Yes, look at the national weather service bulletin, they are already calling for possible school closings.

A Conversation you never think you will have:
Receptionist: Hello?

Me: Yes, hi, I need to schedule an appointment for the IVF talk.

Receptionist: Okay. It takes 45 minutes. How's the Tuesday after next?

All...most.....there

2005-11-30T16:16:00.000-05:00

I have almost recovered from the bustle and gluttony of Thanksgiving. I'll post more soon. I had a great time with the folks but it is taking a while to catch up.

It's been a week since my last post

2005-11-20T18:17:00.000-05:00

It feels like I should say something. But I don't really have anything to discuss. I'm too busy to stop and process things so I don't have any perspective to offer. DH finished a chapter of his dissertation and has sent out nearly 40 job applications. I stayed up until 1:30 in the morning Saturday planning AP discussions. My parents are coming on Wednesday and I'm totally pumped about that.

Anyone else have exciting T-day plans?

Actually, I'll be 27 in 3 weeks.

2005-11-13T20:18:00.000-05:00

Personally, I think I look 16 and act 60 (because of the naps and knitting) but it appears I'm pretty normal.

You Are 29 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe.

13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world.

20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences.

30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more!

40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Ho! Ho! Ho? No! No! No!

2005-11-13T17:10:00.000-05:00

One of my good co-worker friends has a first date for a fancy black-tie gala next weekend. So we spent SIX HOURS shopping yesterday for the correct shoes. Every store we went in had Christmas decorations and Christmas music. This was annoying, but not shocking.

BUT, one mall already had their Santa out and there were long lines of children. This is unacceptable. Doesn't everyone know that Santa doesn't come out until the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade? That is his official debut folks. This is too early.

I am considering making posters and going up to protest. I could make signs that say "Hey kids! This is a FAKE Santa. The real one doesn't come out until after Thanksgiving!" What do you think. Who's with me?

Of course, I still win, because all of those parents have just gotten their kids all excited about Santa coming when he won't be here for another month and a half. Do you know how long that is in kid time?

Just your normal tampon on a sprinkler day

2005-11-10T20:35:00.000-05:00

Here's what happened at my school today:

A new teacher was sick and needed a sub. We have a new automated process for calling in sick. She did not do something right when going through the process.

Her first period ended up being unattended for the entire period. The class apparently had a free-for-all. Towards the end of the period a girl stood up on a chair and tied a tampon to the sprinkler head.

This set off the sprinkler.

The sprinkler set off the fire alarm.

The school was evacuated and the administrators raced around the school to try to figure out what was setting the fire alarm off. One thought he smelled gas. Everyone smelled smoke because the fireplaces in the neighborhood were going for the first time of the season.

Meanwhile, no one from the class has explained what happened and the room is flooding with water. The water is pouring underneath the door and through the walls into other rooms.

The entire school stands outside, many without coats because it was much colder than originally expected.

Finally, they located the problem. The fire department was called because now it was in fact a fire hazard. They shut off the electricity first, then worked for some time until they could get the sprinklers shut off too.

We missed all of our 2nd period class standing outside in the cold. Four classrooms, including the special ed crisis room, have been relocated to the auditorium and library until further notice.

O Happy Day!

2005-11-06T16:06:00.000-05:00

Today is my one year blogiversary! Some things I have learned in the last year:

1. Sometimes you just write a quick post with little thought, and it catches someone's attention and becomes something much bigger.

2. Sometimes you write what you hope will really get people going and no one responds.

3. Even if you write anonymously, you will worry about people you know finding your blog.

4. You write many more posts in your head than actually ever make it onto the screen.

5. Even though it's anonymous, you can find yourself strangely attached to what people think of you.

6. Your blogger you is really no different than the real you. The same struggles and the same strengths appear over time.

**************
Also, at this time I should probably say something about the blogger family tree that is going around. My blog father would have to be Mode For Caleb. I don't have any blog children that I know if. Isn't that ironic?

Clothing Dilemma

2005-11-01T19:24:00.000-05:00

This week is our school's homecoming week. We have a different theme each day. For example, yesterday was costume day. I do not like Halloween (especially at high schools because it is just an excuse for the girls to wear NOTHING) so I did not wear a costume. Today was 70's day. I wore a shirt that I regularly wear but it had a 70's look. Some people caught on, others just thought I was wearing an ugly shirt. So, tomorrow is Wild West Day. What's a Texas girl to do? Had I known in time I could have gotten my real Rodeo clothes from my parents' house. But I was just looking through the closet and discovered my overalls. From high school. I called my co-worker friend and she said go for it. If she was me, she would wear them (she's wearing denim and a bandana).

I dunno. This would be the most drastic I have gone in my 4 years at this school. Other options include a denim dress or cords with dress boots and a denim shirt. All would be accented by my James Avery lone star earrings. It'll be a game-time decision. Anyone with advice should feel free to share. I'm off to try to find my Texas bandana.

This week: the good, the bad, the ugly

2005-10-29T23:46:00.000-04:00

This week at school
The good: We had an assembly this week. All they would tell us was that it was to celebrate our school's succes. All the local political dignitaries were going to be there. Frankly, we are all quite cynical about politicians creating a photo op during our class time. Well it turns out the assembly was just a ploy. It was actually an awards ceremony for a fellow teacher. She had been nominated and selected for an award without her knowledge. At the ceremony they presented her with a check. For $25,000. Totally awesome.

The bad: Quarter grades are due next week. In my two AP classes, there is one 'A'.

The ugly: How about these excerpts from my tenth grade essays:
- United Statesian (as opposed to American)
- greater. (Oh yes I am fully aware that greater is a word. But it isn't a verb. As in "the Athenians had a chance to greater themselves.)
- differen't
- The Greeks were majorly good at art.

This week in Infertility Land
The good: We met with our RE to go over the latest test results. He is completely willing to work with our ethical concerns about IVF. And despite working around those concerns, he thinks our odds are great. (And, trust me, this is all about odds.)

The bad: Neither one of us has ever been to Vegas, or even gambled for that matter.

The ugly: Our odds for IUI. They've basically been reduced to 1%. And that was just being kind.

This week in knitting
The good: The yarn I wanted to make a Christmas scarf has been put on sale!

The bad: I still haven't taken pictures of my tank top, souffle scarf, or miniature tree ornament sweaters to show everyone.

The ugly: I'm not sure I like the miniature sweaters for Christmas trees. They are easy to do (I've done 4 already) because they are done in one piece. But they look kinda cheapy I think. I'll keep working.

Life in general this week
Good: My parents are coming up for Thanksgiving

Bad: 40 degrees and raining.

Ugly: Oh, whoa is me. Another Aggie football season is headed down the tubes. Can I just say I didn't even want them to HIRE Franchione.

The Thing

2005-10-23T17:59:00.000-04:00

It's time for me to come out of the closet.

My blogging has been light of late; I'm sure you've noticed. There's a reason. And it's pretty personal. I kept thinking I would write a post about it, but haven't had the guts. Sometimes I decide this is not the appropriate place. This blog is supposed to be about teaching. (Originally, it was supposed to be about knitting, too. And I have been knitting. I'm just too darn lazy to get the camera out and show you some of my cool projects.)

Anyway, I'm going to tell you my story. And if it's way more information than you wanted, then you can skip it and pretend like you never saw it. I've contemplated making an entirely seperate blog dealing with this issue, as many have, but frankly I can't even find the time to keep up with this one. Anyhoo....here's my story.

**************************************************************************
Every couple has a Thing, it seems. By Thing, I mean a challenge. For my parents, it was moving across the country at 18 with nothing but a dime in their pockets. For others, it is an affair. Or debt. Or weight gain. I don't know, it just seems like every couple will at some point face a challenge that seems insurmountable. In my mind, I have always called it The Thing.

So, enter my husband. He's perfect. All of my friends agreed from the very beginning. Smart, nice, handsome, funny, he has it all. In fact, when we were engaged I actually got annoyed at the number of people that told me I was "lucky," as if I had nothing to offer in this relationship. At my bachelorette party, gathered in our pajamas, my friends insisted my husband was perfect. I cringed when they used that word. I felt they were jinxing me. I thought he was perfect too, but I worried about what our Thing would be. In my mind, I feared he would cheat on me, mainly because I felt I wasn't worthy of someone so great. I resolved to always keep my guard up.

But that was silly. Because my husband is perfect. I should have known our Thing would be something neither of us could control.

This summer the Thing emerged. It appeared over time. A few doctors visits, a few flukes, and then WHAM! some numbers on paper. It turns out, we can't have children. Not on our own at least. I have moved through the same stages of grief someone goes through when they lose a loved one. At this point, even if we do have children, I have lost my innocence. Pregnancy, for me, won't ever come out of a romantic evening. I will hold my breath for nine months, knowing how hard it will be to start over if things fail.

If you have never been in this position you can't imagine the pain. I walk the long way around the mall just so I don't have to see the maternity store. People constantly ask me if I am going to have kids. It feels like getting kicked in the stomach. Even the few people in my life that know our situation aren't always sensitive or thoughtful in their comments (ie: one friend told me I could borrow her DOG).

One particulaly rough day, curled up in the fetal position on the couch and sobbing, I realized that this was our Thing. This was our challenge. We would have to conquer the physical, emotional, and financial toll of this together.

But this wasn't the Thing.

We made an appointment with the top reprodutive endicrinologist (RE) around. We knew before we arrived what he would say. One of our books (A Few Good Eggs) recommended we sit and talk about what we were willing to do BEFORE the appointment so that we didn't get halfway into the ethics and finances and realize we were in over our head. So we discussed our options and our feelings about those options. We knew that we were perfectly comfortable with IUI (interuterine insemination for those of you that don't spend all day on infertility bulletin boards), which really people have been doing with turkey basters since the 1800's. But what about IVF (in vitro fertilization)? How do you make ethical decisions about a science you don't even understand? Well, we dodged the question. IVF costs $15,000 a cycle. We don't have that kind of money to spend on "attempts". We would adopt before we did IVF, we agreed.

So we entered the RE's office. He was great. He went over our test results, looked up, and in his Chilean accent said "These numbers are no problem. We can get you pregnant. I will tell you how." He went on after this, but I wasn't listening. In my mind, I was naming my child...or children...after all, the risk of twins was high. I imagined myself walking out of this very hospital with a baby or two wrapped in a blanket I had knitted. I stopped daydreaming for a second and realized the dr. was talking about IVF. My heart dropped. I cleared my throat and mentioned something about not being able to afford it.

"You teach in X district right?" he said. "You're covered. You have some of the best coverage there is. It's like you just got a $40,000 raise." He went on to explain that we were covered in the fine print. I checked when I got home, and he was right. So my mind went back to babies. We were really going to be able to do this! Now, this whole cross-country move seemed providential. The trials and tribulations of being 1500 miles away from my family would pay off in a new family of our own. A good doctor, good insurance, and technological advancements were going to give me the children I had always dreamed of having.

As he stepped out of the room for a minute, dh piped up and said something about "ethical reservations."

Huh?

Oh yeah. Remember how we dodged that question before? Well here it is. The Thing. It isn't infertility. It's what to do about infertility.

In my best moments, I realize dh is right. I agree with him. I can't just go around discarding embryos like they are nothing. They ARE something. They are us. During these moments, I thank God for dh, because he was level-headed when I couldn't be.

In my worst moments, it is not pretty. There are ways around the ethical dilemmas of IVF, but they aren't as successful. If we never have children, will I blame dh and his high-minded morals for the rest of my life? He has said in as many words, that he sees this as his opportunity to practice the pacifist/respect-ALL-life position he has always defended. So I have been made a martyr by someone else without my permission? Not fair.

But those are the worst moments, and with time I find them hanging in my mind less and less.

When I struggle in trying to decide what to do next, when I sit on an exam table trembling because of some whacked-out test I have to have, when I weigh domestic vs. international adoption and find neither satisfactory, when I try to imagine giving myself injections every day and starting my mornings with daily bloodwork and ultrasounds, I remember that some people just do this naturally. And it makes me bitter. And sometimes I think that is the biggest challenge of all -- to come out of all this still believing that God is good, that people are good, and that all of this will somehow work to my benefit.

Not sorry at all

2005-10-19T18:30:00.000-04:00

Two words, folks:

Hoo. Ray.

This guy is a total crook operating under the Christian name. He makes me sick. I hope they get him good. Not a very merciful attitude I know, but he and I go way back.

Darn! And I was planning on taking so many cruises with my teacher salary

2005-10-13T21:39:00.000-04:00

It is October 13th.

I just saw a Christmas commercial.

It was Carnival Cruises. I hearby boycott all Carnival Cruiselines.

Disgusting. (Not Christmas. I love Christmas.)

Bloglines Pros and Cons

2005-10-11T19:05:00.000-04:00

I'm sure some of you are already familiar with Bloglines and all its glory. If not, you should check it out. Bloglines basically gives you one central place to read all your favorite blogs. It updates automatically so there's no constant checking back needed. You can read just excerpts from posts or expand them into a view of the entire post.

But, there are two things that bother me about using Bloglines. For one, I don't show up on people's stat counters. So, there is at least 1 less visitor counted every day even though I AM reading their blogs.

Secondly, it doesn't allow you to see comments. A post could inspire a comment war that goes on for days, but you won't have a clue if you are using Bloglines.

I still think it's worth it though.

Guess what I am doing tomorrow

2005-10-07T22:58:00.000-04:00

No. Guess. Really. I'll give you a second.

I am getting up at 6:00 on my Saturday morning to drive (well, ride, actually) one and a half hours to a knitting workshop.

That's right. Are you jealous?

I will be taking two classes: provisional cast-ons and making a sweater for a teddy bear. I do not have a teddy bear. I wonder if I'm supposed to have one for the class??

There will be yarn vendors at the workshop too. I will try hard to restrain myself.

Also, my week at school was really good. Seriously. Doesn't make for very interesting blogging I guess, but I am enjoying my classes and my students and I think most of them are learning something. Even the 7-9 parent conference night last night went well. I hope this is not the calm before the storm. I don't need any storms.

Have a good weekend.

What else is new?

2005-10-03T23:35:00.000-04:00

Hey, if you didn't have a problem with an education secretary who never actually taught then you shouldn't have a problem with a Supreme Court judge who has never actually judged.

I had a problem with the non-teaching education secretary though. So, I'm probably going to have a problem with the non-judging judge too. Which is too bad, because I was willing to accept someone more conservative than O'Connor, not because I'm more conservative than O'Connor (though I might be in some ways) but because I don't believe every incoming judge has to look exactly like the outgoing judge. That's just dumb and not at all what presidential appointments are supposed to be about. But I don't think this is what they're supposed to be about either.

Okay. It's much too late to be blogging about politics. I'm going to bed.

Update: While thinking about this in bed last night, it occurred to me that I seem to remember something about an Emergency chief who had no "emergency" experience.

Also, I thought about my discussions with my US students about colonists complaining about the problem of "patronage" when the English crown was viewed as having put his friends in important political positions with no regard to their virtue or qualifications.

Should we start a revolution? No, I don't think so. But we shouldn't be surprised when these things are done by a president whose only political experience involves holding the governorship of Texas, which is the second weakest governorship in the U.S. (behind only South Carolina, another post-Reconstruction anti-executive state).

Okay. The vent is over now. I will go grade papers like a good teacher.

15 minutes of fame

2005-09-29T21:03:00.000-04:00

Whoa. It seems like everyone in this end of the blogosphere was mentioned in NEA's October issue. Everyone except me, that is. Me, and EdWonk, and Polski3. Frankly, I don't care too much that I was left out. But how could any article on blogging in education leave out EdWonk and his weekly carnivals?? And Polski? Well, I'm guessing that has something to do with his critical takes on the California union. I smell a conspiracy.

I'm not here. Go somewhere else

2005-09-27T17:23:00.000-04:00

Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted. But there's no need to apologize because most of my readers are teachers and know that sometimes other things require our attention. Actually, it's been mostly non-teaching things that have required my attention, but more on that sometime later.

Megan over at Open up my head and see what's on my mind has responded to my post below in a lengthy and inspired post. Go on over and check it out. I like that she has focused on teaching as a "calling." I do not argue that we need more inner-city teachers and that their job is tough in ways that I cannot even begin to fathom. But are warm bodies better than teachers? Because that's what I would be. If that's not what I'm cut out to do, should I do it anyway because they need people? How does that help the situation? Inner-city schools don't just need teachers, they need GOOD teachers. Maybe my way of helping solve the problem is to make my own students aware of the disparities that exist in schools today (and you better believe I bring it up in several units). Maybe my teaching of both knowledge, skills, and morals will convince one of my students to teach in the city. But I do well where I am. And just because other people would like my job does not mean I am replacable (as suggested in a comment in the previous post).

In defense of my usefulness

2005-09-17T16:44:00.000-04:00

Two posts below I described my experience at Back-To-School Night. I got a comment that I have decided to respond to in full-blown-post fashion instead of simply adding a comment.

In response to my super parent post Mrs. X writes:

Good schools don't need you. Those kids will get into college and 'succeed' with or without you. Challenge yourself! Go to one of the schools with the problems and succeed there. Then you'll know what being a life-changing teacher really means.

Wow. Okay, so it is 4:45 on Saturday afternoon and literally the only thing I have done for myself is a quick Starbucks breakfast. Otherwise I have been working on school things all day. Since the standard U.S. History course I taught the last two years begins with Reconstruction, I have been scrambling every day to refresh my colonial and revolutionary history knowledge from my freshman year in college and then organize it so that I can teach it at a college level.

And then I get a message that tells me my work is not valuable. It stings a little. In Mrs. X's defense, I understand her general point. While I was in school I poured through Jonathan Kozol's books and had every intention of teaching at an inner-city school. And then I moved to a big East Coast city and suddenly I felt all the insecurities of being a 5 foot 4 white girl from the south. But it wasn't just the fear that kept me from taking a high-needs job. I can't afford it. Remember than I am married to a PhD student. He makes less than half what I do and deals with twice the stress. One of us has to be sane. I just decided it wasn't time for me to do that.

Secondly, my kids most certainly DO need me. Teenagers are teenagers wherever you go. They all have insecurities, they all face peer pressure, they all have lousy families. Oftentimes, I see myself as a protector of the students whose parents are overly involved. My students are stressed to an unhealthy level because of the pressure their parents put on them. They see themselves as failures when they can't score all A's in a load of 6 AP courses. They engage in risky behaviors because of it. While I challenge my students, I try to convince them that it is about learning itself and not the outcome. I try to convince them that I think they are valuable and worthy of my love, even if they can't pass my tests.

I face a significant challenge in trying to help my students define what "success" is. Unfortunately, many of them see it as Mrs. X defines it -- getting into a good college. I try to teach them that success if much more complicated than just academics. I also insist that success is not always the ultimate goal. Sometimes doing the right thing is more important. I have had very frank discussions with my students about using dishonest means and cheating in order to achieve success. I have worked to open up a dialogue and I am glad I have because what I have discovered is that many of my students see any means as justified if they can get that 'A'. People like Martha Stewart and the Enron executives needed to have a teacher like me.

In a school as competitive as mine, there are still students who don't fit in. The students in my standard classes KNOW they didn't belong at this high school. I am there to insist that they still challenege themselves, that they still strive for excellence, and that they still respect themselves.

My students have eating disorders, drug addictions, health problems, overachieving siblings, and pressure to look, walk, and act the right way. If I don't help them, who will?

So, I broke the law today.

2005-09-16T23:24:00.000-04:00

Yep. That's right. Perhaps the next time I post will be from jail. Except it won't.

As I'm sure many of you are aware, tomorrow is National Constitution Day. The government was very upset that the general public doesn't know much about the Constitution, so they mandated that public schools and other federal programs do something to increase awareness of our founding document once a year. Since they set the first one for a Saturday, our school was supposed to celebrate today.

Oh, dear, where to begin?

First of all, if teaching students government (as we do for all 9th graders in our district) all year long doesn't help them understand the Constitution, then how will focusing on it one day help? And, if after that year they still don't get it, how will stopping in the middle of World History (10th graders) to spend ONE DAY on it help either? There is, in fact, Constitutional education going on in schools. It might not be working, but that is an entirely different matter.

But that's not the biggest issue for me. So the government tried to fix a problem and failed. What else is new?

My issue with this is that I do not like the government telling me what I have to teach on any particular given day. This is scary folks. It is not a great precedent. It's a new level of federal regulation. Dare I remind you that Hitler gained support for his anti-Semitic ways by controlling what students learned?

Okay, I know that's a very far stretch. Or is it? To me, what this whole Constitution Day is really about is patriotism. At best, it's strongly encouraged patriotism and at worst it's forced patriotism. I do not think it coincidental that they chose a date so close to September 11th.

Additionally, as one man from the CATO Institute put it, "we think it's ironic that they are supporting education about the Constitution through unconstitutional means." (Or something like that, I don't have the newspaper article in front of me.)

So, today I did not teach about the Constitution. My tenth graders learned about Hammurabi's Code and my eleventh graders learned how to write an AP essay. In two weeks they'll be writing an essay on the Constitution, and they will be glad that I talked to them about how to write essays today and talked about the Constitution where it fits in the curriculum, which is AFTER the American Revolution. I invoked what I believe is my constitutional right to NOT teach the Constitution. I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure at least some of America's framers would be with me.

By the way, I will not be going to jail. The law included no enforcement powers. So if you didn't celebrate, no worries.

Turns out

2005-09-14T20:22:00.000-04:00

Turns out I did not have cold/allergy problems as I previously believed.

Turns out I have viral bronchitis instead.

Turns out you should not take your normal cold/allergy medicine when you have bronchitis.

Turns out if you take allergy meds with bronchitis it will just make things worse. You will be congested beyond belief, with a terrible cough and the need to clear your throat constantly.

Turns out that coughing and clearing your throat constantly make you lose your voice. Completely.

Turns out that the new Minute Clinics at Target really are fast. You can get there, get diagnosed, and get back to school in one class period.

Turns out you cannot lead a discussion on the Great Awakening with your AP kids when your voice sounds like a frog going through puberty. You will have to show a video instead.

So, here's to hoping tomorrow turns out better because I can't let my AP classes fall behind so early on. Luckily my tenth graders are still in the library working on projects and the librarians are sooo helpful. My students, too, have been very sympathetic and nice.

You know you work in a good school when....2nd edition

2005-09-11T17:14:00.000-04:00

UPDATE: Um, hello? I had a major proofreading error in the title for almost a week now and none of you said anything? You're too nice!

And now for the Back to School Night edition of "you know you work in a good school when..." (Incidentally, Back to School Night might be known as "Meet the Teacher Night" or something else to some of you. Parents rotate through their child's schedule, spending ten minutes in each class.)

1. A student's mother, father, grandmother, and grandfather attend
2. The grandfather asks a history related question
3. Some class sessions are standing room only
4. Teacher are instructed to arrive by 6 so they can find parking, even though nothing officially starts until 7
5. A father pulls me aside to ask my opinion of "Guns, Germs and Steel"
6. A mother pulls me aside to see if I need any supplies for my classroom or chaperones for History Club events
7. A fellow teacher who lives in the neigborhood has the whole social studies department over for dinner, and you actually enjoy one another's company

So, overall it was a good night. But it is the longest day of the year. We don't leave until nearly 10 pm and school begins at 7:30 am. Every year I swear I will just take a pillow and sleeping bag. Add to this that I have my first cold of the year. I'm taking it easy all day today though and hopefully will be rip-roaring ready to go tomorrow.

Just keepin on keepin on

2005-09-06T19:06:00.000-04:00

Howdy everyone!

I'm just checking in. Like many of you, I'm finding lots of material for posting, but not a lot of energy. The beginning of the year is just always so overwhelming.

My AP classes are still going smoothly, but not super-duper. One problem is that the two sections I have are so different that I think I'll never had a good day with both of them. One class is 1st period with 30 kids, 13 of whom are moving up from honors and 3 of which are smartie-pants boys that want to call me on every little detail. The other section is 7th period (last) with only 24 kids, most of them super organized and super social girls. They did, however, ALL laugh at my Napoleon Dynamite joke. (What does every guy need to get a girl? Skills. Napoleon would have been proud of the New England settlers because they had farming skills, unlike the Jamestown settlers who didn't even have numchuck skills.)

World History is world history. Smooth and a little boring because I find the early history somewhat uninspiring. But we'll be starting a big project by the end of the week. YAY library days!

Hey, I had a nice time in Texas, thanks for asking. It was nice to be in Houston and see all the positive things going on to help hurricane victims when everything on the news has been so negative and upsetting. My sister's church service was especially uplifting. The church, with about, 250 active members, is in charge of 160 "survivors" (what they are calling them instead of refugees) and 150 members signed up to spend their Labor Day getting trained to serve food at the Astrodome.

I hope everyone had a nice 3 day weekend and you're off to a smooth start. I'll try to catch up on blog reading and commenting soon.

The first week in five words or less

2005-09-01T21:01:00.000-04:00

Okay maybe more words than that. But it's almost time for bed and I don't want to leave my loyal readers in suspense any longer, so I'll give you a quick summary of the week.

My first week of advanced placement classes has been okay. Not great, but not terrible. Really they seem to start out really well and then lose steam at about the thirty minute mark. The kids begin looking like zombies. I don't know if this is due to the 85 degree weather combined with 90 percent humidity or if it is that I seem to get lost in my notes at that point. Either way, I've decided I need to not micromanage the discussions so much and let them guide me more. We shall see. One student has dropped out.

GT World History has been fine. The kids seem pretty good.

Other than that there really isn't a lot to report. We did have a student faint the first day of school due to heat. This is the second year in a row this has happened. People haven't complained much about the weather though, considering it is way better than what Louisiana is facing right now. (I plan a future post on the hurricane, by the way).

So all in all, not a stellar week, but it could have been much worse. Tomorrow I will go straight from school and hop a plane to Houston for the weekend so I can meet my 3 week-old nephew. Have a good weekend everyone!

Tomorrow is...

2005-08-28T17:15:00.000-04:00

The first day of school.
A student's favorite,
A teacher's least.

Wish me luck!

The week in review

2005-08-27T17:02:00.000-04:00

Whew! I just read through all the unread posts in my bloglines account and that took awhile. Most of you, though, have been a little slow in posting too because everyone is in various stages of Back-to-schoolness.

I finished up the teacher development week and here are the highlights. Remember that I was starting out at 1 ahead.

+1 The AP took pity on me for my recent bad breaks and told me I could get another teacher to cover for my lunch duty one day a week. Other teacher was thrilled to do so because it got her out of other obligations.

-2 Opps. Things change again. AP now needs other teacher to serve lunch duty WITH me every day. So now I'm back to 5 day a week lunch duty.

+3 Everyone in the school got new computers. Our school got more new computers than anyone else in the district. This was because our school needed them the most though.

+1 Got everything loaded onto new computer with relative ease.

-3 Dude, they got Dells. I say this sarcastically. We were instructed to leave our comuters on overnight so that software could be loaded via the network. I came in the next morning and had an error message. The computer would not restart. When we finally got it turned off, it never turned on again. Ever. Had to switch out computer and reload everything.

+1 Bought a thumb drive. It works great!

+2 Continued jamming with IPod all week long.

-1 Got my class lists. There are some names I am pretty sure I will never say right. This year's names are by far the most complicated I've ever had. Here's to nicknames!

+1 One of my first period students came by to see if they needed any special supplies (they don't) and to tell me she goes by a different, much more pronouncable name (thank goodness!).

-2 Our closest network printer is broken. So, anytime we printed something we had to go to the other wing of the school to get it.

+2 Department head said if we brought our own printers into our rooms, he would buy ink for them all year long.

+1 The cat definitely missed me.

-3 Our district has a new policy. Any employee who is absent five days for personal or family illness will get an "official letter" and must begin producing doctors' notes when the are absent to avoid future letters and actions. Their excuse for this is that we are just abiding by the same standards we expect of our students. Excuse me? We have the same standards as our students??!! Then you'll be willing to take a note from my mother when I'm sick too, thank you very much. Total.load.of.bologna.

I think that's about it. And it leaves me at +2 overall as we close out the preseason and gear up for the real thing, starting Monday.

Back to school recap

2005-08-22T20:52:00.000-04:00

In our district teachers report back a full week before students do. I think this is longer than some other school systems. Anyway, because I'm exhausted I'm going to summarize the day in wins and losses.

LOSSES
-4 I arrived to find that I had been assigned "substitute coverage" as my daily duty. This is waaaaay better than lunch duty. Score! But alas, at the end of the day I had an email from the AP telling me that they had to rearrange things and I now had lunch duty instead.

-1 I could not find the giant rolls of GoWrite at our local stores. This is stick on dry erase board. It works like contact paper but is easy to peel off and reapply. I had to order it online, so who knows when it will get here.

-2 Early class lists show I did not get some of the students I really really wanted.

-1 I have so far spent $100 on my classroom. I know this isn't much but I swore I wasn't spending a dime!

-2 The teacher that is moving in next to me is so annoying. I think she has a bad home life, so she stays up at school for all hours and will corner you and talk to you to death about all kinds of uncomfortable things.

-2 Someone stole my fan and my big comfy desk chair. The fan was recovered but the desk chair was not.

-1 The cable has not been turned on yet. (I don't have cable at home.)

WINS
+1 The weather is very mild right now. It makes my classroom almost bearable.

+3 My lunch duty is in the satellite (p.c. word for new, because we don't want the old wing to feel "old") cafeteria where all the goody-goody nerds eat. Sometimes you can even sit down!

+2 My goal was to get my entire room unpacked and reput together today. I did just that and a little more. Bulletin boards and all are done, excepting the GoWrite stuff.

+2 My department head is still feeling guilty about the classroom shuffle and basically says yes to everything I ask.

+2 I plugged my ipod into computer speakers and jammed all day while I worked.

+2 My conference period is at the same time as one of my pal's.

+1 I think the cat missed me while I was gone.

+1 A coworker gave me 400 scantrons she wasn't going to use!

So it looks like so far I am winning by 1. Let's hope I can add some more points tomorrow!

Tip #8

2005-08-22T20:49:00.000-04:00

I've been teaching for 3 years. No one has ever told me this. I learned it the hard way. I'll pass it on and hope you learn from my mistake.

Never ever EVER go to the local teacher supply store on the first teacher work day.

EVER.

Another reason to go back to work

2005-08-17T10:21:00.000-04:00

A recent AP-AOL poll shows that 63% of Americans say a teacher "made a difference" in their lives.

Looking ahead

2005-08-16T23:30:00.000-04:00

My anti-burn-out plan of being lazy all day and doing nothing school related seems to be helping a little. Today was a rainy, cool day. It felt a little like Fall, which always helps me to get in the school spirit. I instantly begin thinking about football and new beginnings. Let's hope this trend continues.

In an effort to pump myself, I thought I'd spend a little time looking back over my evaluations from this past year. They were positive for the large part, AND were improved over the year before.

Here are the first three questions from my end of the year survey for my U.S. and World History students and some selected responses that make me feel proud (my comments in parantheses, spelled as is):

1. The most interesting idea or concept we studied this year was...
- Harlem Renaissance (I got this several times)
- Great Depression (This is usually the most popular, but I got fewer this year)
- Galileo's Daughter (the book I made them read. I got this several times even though it was a LOT of work)
- The Civil Rights movements, learning what minorities had to go through to achieve equality
- All of it! (suck up!)
- The study of integration because it caused the most contreversey between me and the other students
- World Wars

2. The most important idea or concept we studied this year was...
- all of it
- laws and amendments
- Black history
- how nationalism led to WWI and eventually WWII because so many people were affected by an idea
- the cyclical view of history throughout the world
- modern history
- imperialism
- change can take a toll
- I guess it would have to be revolution. We used that world more than any other.
- Galileo because it showed how there are many intricate details of history that we usually remain ignorant of

3. This course readlly made me think about...
- politics more than I ever have before; they became more interesting
- history, I actually learned!!!
- the differences in religion and how it affected nations' feelings of superiority and desire for domination
- the impact our generation will have on the future, which will eventually be reduced to a paragraph in a textbook
- "what if" scenarios, like what if Japan hadn't industrialized, or what if Europe hadn't imperialized America
- I shouldn't become a history major
- how one person can affect many people
- wanting to study European history in college and the future
- my role in the government
- how lucky we are
- the future and what we can do to improve it
- how much better this country would be if I was president
- this country is screwed up
- the more I learn the more I know I need to learn, Plato
- how screwed up society is, how grossly Republican this school is
- how past social and political events can affect us today

So, the question is, what am I complaining about? I get paid to this? I CAN do this!

Today: A Day in 4 Parts

2005-08-15T21:34:00.000-04:00

The goal for today was to get all the annoying errand type activities done before the school year started. It was jam packed with fun.

Part I: The Oil Change
We have a 2002 Honda and we change the oil every 5,000 miles. We got a credit card with Firestone because they have cheap deals, are quick, and have many locations including one next to a Starbucks.

Today I decided to go to a different Firestone branch because it was near PetCo and I also needed food for the cat. The guy there was very nice -- told me I could get a cheaper deal with my card instead of the coupon I presented. I also asked for a tire rotation, which he told me WAS cheaper with the coupon. He sounds nice right?

About 20 minutes into my time there, he came out and said "Abigail, I can't steal your twenty dollars to rotate your tires because it won't help. You need two new tires."

Huh? Our car has 30,000 miles on it. Aren't tires supposed to last longer than that?

"Your alignment is way off and it has worn the tread off on the inner parts of the tires. I called the other Firestone you usually go to and they said they've never aligned it. Have you ever had it aligned?"

I told him yes, I thought I had it done at an Exxon a while back. He told me they did a bunk job. I told him I wanted to check on my warranty and talk to my husband about which tires I would want.

How the heck do I know if I really need tires or this is just another scam? I hate dealing with mechanics. I am completely at their mercy. DH will take a look at the tires tomorrow and maybe he can tell something. In the mechanic's favor, he did not charge me to align the tires, so technically he lost money of the deal.

Part II: The Confrontation
I had not been able to talk to my department head about my having to move back into my old room because he was on vacation. Today he was back and I headed up to school to discuss the issue with him.

He was very sympathetic. It turns out it was not actually him that rehired maniac teacher. It was the assistant principal. He agreed with me that she should not even be coming back after the way she treated everyone. He couldn't believe she WANTED to come back after burning every bridge. Plus, he basically took all the classes no one wanted to teach and gave them to her. In talking about my frustration, I started to tear up a little despite my best efforts. Then, he started to tear up too. I ended up not throwing much of a fit at all. In fact, talking to him gave me some perspective because I am pretty sure he has had a worse summer than me. (Remember that he lost his mother-in-law last June.) I also expressed that I felt a lot of pressure teaching AP and he reemphasized that none of that pressure would be coming from him or the principal because this was my first year and I should just do my best. I didn't really feel relieved, but I did feel less anger I guess.

Another highlight: when we went into my room to unload some books I realized that all my stuff was gone. The custodians had been kind enough to move it into my new room. So, I had to head down there and drag it all back. I took a minute to stand in my room that never was. I breathed in the air conditioning, stared at the dry erase boards, and imagined what could have been. "Don't worry," I told the room, "I'll be back. And don't forget, for one short summer you were mine." Sigh.

Part III: The Dentist
I do not like going to the dentist. There are few things in life I fear more than the words "root canal." The only reason I go is because I know it prevents future problems that could be much worse.

In that sense, I guess today was a lucky break. Today, my dentist refused to see me. That's right. I showed up for my appointment and was sent away. It's a long story. Basically, I marked on my medical history form 4 years ago that I had a heart murmur. I had never had it checked out because the doctor didn't think it was a concern. The dentist, after treating me for 2 years, noticed the information and insisted I get an echocardiagram before she would treat me further. Fine. I did. The cardiologist said there were no problems.

This summer our dentist moved to Florida and sold her practice to a new guy. Same location, same receptionist, etc. The receptionist called me last Wednesday to ask me to have the cardiology reports sent over. Well, the doctor retired and I had a hard time tracking them down and they didn't get there by today. This dentist refused to treat me because he did not have a copy of the cardiology report itself. He refused to accept a signed paper from me that I had in fact been checked out and was fine.

Time for a new dentist.

Part IV: The Reward
I bribe myself to go to the dentist by scheduling a haircut afterwards. I needed a haircut anyway, and it would just be RUDE to cancel on such short notice, so I kept the appointment even though I did not technically see the dentist.

We went to a new place that the dh had discovered. It was amazing. They provide free sodas, beer, wine, and ice cream. Then they have these giant movie screens. You sit in a personal room that looks out onto the movie screen and also has a personal monitor with sound controls. You can also choose to change the channel on your personal monitor to a variety of cable stations. No more uncomfortable small talk! The best part, of course, was the scalp message. It literally sent tingles down to my toes. It felt sooo good and frankly, I deserved it. Maybe this was the beginning of a better week for me!

Admitting it is the first step

2005-08-11T18:43:00.000-04:00

Well, first things first. I am an aunt for the third time -- my second nephew was born today. I haven't seen pics yet but I have heard him cry over the phone and he sounds cute! He is healthy and my sister seems to have had a (comparitively) easy delivery. Her contractions started at two minutes apart so things went really fast. I'll fly down Labor Day to meet him in person.

In school news, I have become very worried about myself. I am afraid I have become one of the "bitter" teachers. Thanks to all of you for sharing support and advice. There is not really a lot I can do about the classroom situation because apparently we were legtally REQUIRED to hire her back. I could make a bigger mess out of things and probably get a better room, somehow, but I would burn a lot of bridges in along the way.

What this really highlights is that our schools are in pitiful condition. Teachers should not have to fight about who gets the air conditioned room, or a room at all. EVERY teacher should have a clean, well-lit, and comfortable room. This should be non-negotiable. But in my district, a school is not even considred "overcrowded" until every classroom is filled every period. To do this, 2/7ths of the teachers would have to float. This is unacceptable. My classroom is part of my behavior management plan. My classroom is tailored to my teaching and my subjects. Things would be very different, and I would argue less effective, if I had to push all my supplies on a cart. As it is, I can guarantee you that I am not as good of a teacher when it is 82 degrees in my room, nor are my students the ideal learners they usually are.

Anyway, I've been teaching for 3 years now. I thought I had survived the early drop-out, burn-out phase in teachers that all the research points to.* I am good at what I do, to be honest. The students like me. They learn, even the tough ones. My principal and department head give me great reviews and there are several co-workers that I adore and find mutually supportive. So, why, with only one and a half weeks left in the summer, do I feel the same dread, the same burn-out that I felt at the end of the last school year? This is not like me. Usually, I am sad to see the lazy days end, but feel a twang of excitement at getting fresh students and starting over in the curriculum.

To answer my own question, I think the number one problem is that I spent three weeks of the summer in workshops. One should not spend 8-9 hours days with fellow teachers for extended amounts of time. If you think about it, we don't even do this during the school year -- we're mostly on our own. Professional development is frequently helpful but also always highlights what frustrates me about the education system. Those three weeks left me more frustrated than when I started.

I guess I am also stressed about teaching AP U.S. History at such a competitive school. I am not looking forward to the insane amount of work and self-doubting that go along with teaching a course like that. And all summer long, when I thought of it and got a pain in my stomach, I reminded myself that I would at least be doing all of this in a new classroom. Of course, that's not the case anymore.

So that's my story. I've got a little over a week to get my butt in gear and realize how lucky I am to be at such a good school. But, I'm not feelin' it. I'm just not feelin' it.

*I think those numbers are inflated though -- I think a lot of people go into teaching because they know they can leave after a few years and then come back with relative ease. It seemed like half the sorority girls at A&M were education majors because they really planned on being stay-at-home moms. People who go into teaching only PLANNING to teach for a few years shouldn't be included with those that quit in frustration.

26 minutes and counting

2005-08-08T23:34:00.000-04:00

It is 11:34 here and so far I've made it through the day without any major problems. (Unless you count the fact that three of the things on my grocery list were not at the store, including two things that were advertised. But in contrast to recent issues, this was nothing.)

We might even count today as a success seeing as how I finished this little handbag. It is knitted in seed stitch with deco-ribbon from Crystal Palace Yarns, in case you're wondering.

By the way, my sister is now 8 days past her due date with her first baby. They're going to induce Thursday.

Injury, meet insult. Insult, injury.

2005-08-07T19:53:00.000-04:00

So, last week was pretty pathetic. But today starts a new week. I put on my best face and headed to church. DH was filling in for our pastor who was out-of-town. We went out with friends for a great brunch.

Then I came home and checked my messages.

Remember how we had to reduce our staff numbers because of NCLB?

Remember how our most combative, least team-supporting teacher was transfered?

Remember how I would be moving out of my no air conditioning, no windows classroom into her classroom with air conditioning AND dry erase boards?

Remember how I spent two days packing up my room, pulling down my bulletin boards, etc?

Well, one of our other teachers has quit. (Yes, quit, with a whopping two weeks left in the summer. But this was the guy who had his trailer doused in gasoline, so what do you expect.) So, for whatever reason we have rehired the teacher that was tranferred out (despite the fact that she was soooooo rude to everyone who tried to be nice to her when she was leaving. We got her a going-away gift and she literally told us to take the gift and shove it up our ****.) AND, she HAS to have her room back because of "medical reasons".

So I will not be moving. I packed up for no reason. I will be spending my third year in the classroom known to all as the "dungeon." This is the longest any teacher has stayed in that room. But don't worry, my department head told me on the message, they won't be changing my schedule.

Gee, how kind of you. The ONLY reason he is doing this to me is because he hates confrontation and the woman who is being rehired is much more likely to make his life miserable than me. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Well you know what??!! He chose the wrong week to pick on me. I'm going up there tomorrow and I will not be carrying any WD-40.

NCAA Mascot Ban

2005-08-06T23:51:00.000-04:00

This morning as I was ranting over my bagel about the recent NCAA ban on Native American mascots, the hubby responded "sounds like a blog post."

But I see EdWonk has already expressed my sentiment. I side with the politically correct on a lot of issues but I am not convinced on this. Aren't mascots about bravery, honor, and teamwork? What about the Patriots or Cowboys? Now, if the school played up the mascot as overly violent and barbaric, I might have a problem with that. But I haven't really seen any instances of that.

Ugh.

2005-08-05T14:18:00.000-04:00

Tuesday was dh's birthday. His father and brother had been in town and stayed long enough for cake and ice cream before heading back. I made a snickerdoodle cake with mocha icing. It was great. We went out to eat and had a great dinner. Later, we went to the Apple store to get dh a well-deserved powerbook (our first mac). I got an ipod out of the deal (one of the few financial perks of being married to a grad student is the student discount programs). We were riding high as we walked out of the Apple store with our haul.

Since then, nothing in my life has gone right. I. Mean. Nothing. All of my family is alive and in one piece and I guess I should be thankful for that but I am having a hard time keeping a positive outlook.

I try to keep this blog about education and knitting and other things listed in my subheading so I'll spare you the details for now. I just wanted to warn you that posting might be a little sparse over the next few days.

Next week I hope to start pumping myself up for the school year by sharing excerpts from this past year's student evaluations.

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

A friendly suggestion

2005-08-01T21:21:00.000-04:00

Can I offer some advice to anyone who ever attempts to engage in polite conversation? If you know a woman (or a man, for that matter) who is in her 20's-30's, happily married, and does not have kids, you can assume one of three things:

1. She does not want kids. Frankly, this should be a socially acceptable position, and they also have no obligation to discuss this decision with you.

2. She wants kids but is waiting for some reason. In this case, it is always possible that it is a touchy subject between two spouses, which means you are bringing up a sore subject.

3. She wants kids but is having trouble or has been told she can't. This is true in way more instances than anyone imagines. 1 in 6 couples face infertility at some point. If the person you are talking to is included in that group, you could be causing a lot of pain. She may not tell you they are having problems because it is none of your business, and she may smile and nod, but inside she is cringing.

You can avoid this situation by recognizing that people's reproductive lives are NONE of your business. I read To Kill a Mockingbird a very long time ago but one thing that sticks out in my mind is the statement that lawyers should never ask a question they don't already know the answer to. You should stick to that rule in discussing people's personal lives. The best way to be sensitive is to not bring it up. If a person wants your advice or input in when, why, or how to have children, they'll ask you.

Otherwise, mind your own business.

The end of my career?

2005-07-28T20:14:00.000-04:00

Today's lunch at the faculty club was Chinese themed, complete with fortune cookies. I quote my fortune:

Financial hardship in your life is coming to an end. Enjoy!

So apparently I won't be teaching this year.

More adventures from teaching camp

2005-07-27T20:51:00.000-04:00

The teaching history workshop continues to have its pluses and minuses. A giant minus would be Mr. Bigmouth. You all know Mr. Bigmouth. He thinks everything he has to say is important and completely dominates all conversation. Talks loud. Voices opinions and ideas that are outrageous and a sometimes offensive. The worst part about having Mr. Bigmouth in class (and let's face it, there's ALWAYS a Mr. Bigmouth) is that no one else gets to participate. I mean, sure, I could raise my hand and say something, but after he blabs on for twenty minutes I'm just ready for the professor to move on.

On a more positive/humorous note:

Today we discovered that the $15 "copy and print" cards are really just I.D. cards with money added to them (as most colleges today have). So, that means we can use these cards to buy iced coffee at the coffee shop and snacks at the vending machine. SCORE!

Today after lunch we were enjoying our iced coffees and talking. Then, we realized it was time to go. We had a 1:00 meeting in the library with the state archives. Now, let me back up a little to say that yesterday we also had a 1:00 meeting with a librarian who took 15 minutes to get started while we sat there staring at computers he had deliberately frozen so that we could not use. So, we were a little bitter. We decided we weren't finished talking and we could afford to be a little late to our meeting. After all, six of us were sitting there and there are only eight in the class. So we took our sweet time and headed to the library at 1:02. (Teachers are such nerds! We consider ourselves rebels by being five minutes late!)

Well, low and beyond, when we all strolled into our meeting guess who was there...Not just anyone. The STATE ARCHIVIST. And the workshop director. They did not look happy. We didn't realize this was an important meeting. We will not be late again. But we will still buy iced coffee. Who makes 1500 copies in a two week period?

Give up?

2005-07-25T15:45:00.000-04:00

No guesses, eh?? I thought this would be easy. I think you were imagining it as a puzzle of some sort, and it wasn't really.

The phrases listed in my last post are all subject lines for spam emails. More specifically, they are all subject lines for emails trying to sell me Viagra or other similar drugs. They raise some questions:

1. Where in the world do they come up with those lines? I know they are just trying to get around spam blockers, but they require a lot of creativity.

2. Who is buying this stuff???! Someone out there MUST respond to telemarketers and spammers or they wouldn't continue to solicit in these ways. I don't know a single person who has ever bought something as a result of a telemarketer or spam email. If you are one of them, please stop.

In other news, I started my second workshop of the season. This one is paid for by a Department of Ed. grant. Your tax dollars at work! It serves three purposes. One is to help us improve our content knowledge. This is done through the teaching of a local professor. Second is to help us integrate that knowledge into practical classroom exercises. This is facilitated through a "master teacher." There is also a third component of primary source research in which we are to research a topic and then write up a detailed (6 or so pages) lesson plan with extensive background knowledge provided. This is the part I am least excited about, probably because it requires the most work. (Hey, it's summer. I'm allowed to be lazy.)

The first day wasn't nearly as bad as I had feared. The presence of a master teacher makes sure things don't get too "pie in the sky." Also it is a very small group. There are only teachers in the high school group.

The best part is that we get paid! We receive a $1,000 stipend, a $15 copy and print card for the library, and free lunch every day for the two weeks at the faculty dining club. Not bad eh? To be honest, if it weren't for the thousand dollars I probably wouldn't be doing it -- not because I don't think professional development is important, but because the focus is on post-1945 U.S. History and that is my strongest area. I really need to be spending these two weeks on pre-Civil War history, but oh well.

A little game

2005-07-19T16:12:00.000-04:00

For those of you getting lazy this summer, here's a game I've made up. How are the following "phrases" related?

Do talk it dottle
With count as rand
was comb the forbearing mawkish
As talk be preservation
My draw on nonce
He write it reform
He type of physic
As borrow on saturation caravan
This 1 2 call
*New clue* NotaCheapImitation

Rules:
1. Since I've made this game up, you might find it stupid. You might find it exceptionally easy or hard. Too bad.
2. First one to post the correct response in the comments wins.
3. You don't actually win anything.
4. Readers directly related to Abigail are not allowed to play. This only concerns one person.

What is wrong with this picture?

2005-07-17T20:35:00.000-04:00

Today I saw one of my fellow teachers. The dh and I had gone to Chili's for lunch after church. She wasn't eating though. She was waiting tables. The worst part is that the Chili's is on the same street as our school and there are students in there all the time. How do you nullify what little credibility you have in the classroom in less than an hour? Depend on them for tips.

That's great, but...

2005-07-14T22:23:00.000-04:00

So, Margaret Spellings and co. are jumping up and down because test scores went up. That's great. Really. But at what expense? Did the report say anything about:

1. Music?
2. Art?
3. Creativity?
4. Teacher morale?
5. Teacher turnover?
6. Children's health?

It makes me nuts!

2005-07-14T20:47:00.000-04:00

EdWonk has been talking about the need for tort reform and stupid lawsuits. I'm guessing lawsuits are what's behind all the new allergy labeling on foods. I think it's probably a good thing that some products are being labeled. I mean, I'm sure there are some foods you wouldn't guess that have wheat or nuts, or whatever. And it can't really hurt the food companies to print one more piece of information on the label. But, I think things are going a little far now. Have you noticed that when you buy nuts the label says "warning. this package may contain nuts or was produced in a factory that handles nuts." Shocking! If you don't believe me, go to your pantry or nearby grocery store and look. I'll wait.

Admitting the truth

2005-07-13T23:39:00.000-04:00

I mentioned in my book meme that I am a fan of Sarah Vowell. What I've never had the courage to say, up to this point, is that I am also a fan of (cough cough) Jimmy Carter. Actually, he's my favorite president. Please don't make fun of me. I have my reasons. The main reason I like Carter is that he tried to do what was right, even if it wasn't successful. This is an ideal lost on most Americans today.

Anyway, Vowell has an op-ed in today's New York Times that suggests Bush should use one of Carter's techniques. She goes back to Carter's wildly UNpopular "malaise" speech and suggests that honesty would be refreshing at this point. It's a funny article, but I agree with it.

Christmas in July!

2005-07-11T20:50:00.000-04:00

Well, obviously no one wants to read about my spiritual problems. I don't blame you. (If you do, well keep scrolling down, but don't say I didn't warn you.)

So, I thought I'd try out blogger's new images program. I'm going to try to post a couple of pictures. Unfortunately, the picture of my innertube bruise didn't come out all that well. I know you're disappointed. Instead, I thought we could all use a bit of winter during the hot summer days. These are pictures from this past Christmas when Houston had its first White Christmas EVER. This is my parents' house and their hibiscus.

Religion Quiz

2005-07-10T22:45:00.000-04:00

I took this religion quiz a while back and am just getting around to posting it. I wish it was this simple. I wish I could take a quiz and it would tell me what I really think. Hey maybe God could grade it for us. At the end it could say "Congratulations! You've been saved!" or "Uh oh! Better go study some more!"

I haven't been in a great place spiritually for awhile. Sometimes I think it's getting better but really I think during those times I'm just too busy to notice. It always gets worse during the summer when I have time to think. I was telling the dh, too, that what is so discouraging about it is that when I have little break downs, I don't feel like I come out of it stronger. I just sink lower and lower. I wonder some day when I'll lose complete grasp and end up with no faith at all. The past few weeks I've been feeling a little more hopeful probably in thanks to some books I've been reading by authors who feel similarly.

A little bit of history before we get on to the results of the quiz. My church background resembles that of a military brat. We started out in the Presbyterian church, but left when I was about 6. Because I was small and my parents really didn't talk to me about things, I thought that we left the church because sometimes the toilets weren't flushed in the ladies room. Honest to God. It's a long story how I got to that conclusion but the real reason we left is because they got a female pastor and because my mom was in charge of the shut-in visitation group and found out that two of the people she sent out on visits were having an affair with one another and my mom was the only one that didn't know.

We headed over to the Methodist church, not really because of any doctrinal issues but because they had a new church and lots of my parents' friends were there. Then we switched Methodist churches when I was in junior high because I wanted to go to the church where all of my school friends went.

I was pretty active there. By then my mom had become pretty jaded and they dropped me off at church before they went to play golf. Then, in high school, I got a serious boyfriend. Serious. And he informed me that I was, in fact, going to Hell because I went to a denominational church. So, after some serious arguments with the parents (and honestly, a lot of independent Bible studying on my part -- especially for a high schooler) I ended up at a southern, conservative, Church of Christ.

This was one of those churches where only the people that think exactly like you go to Heaven. For a high schooler, it's so tempting because everything is complete black and white. There is good and evil, Heaven and Hell, and if you just read the Bible it's clear which is which. If you're confused it's because you're letting your own feelings get in the way and you don't really want to know the truth.

I broke up with my boyfriend, went to college, and found another southern conservative Church of Christ. That's where I met the dh. But one of the reasons we were attracted to each other was because we were both so frustrated with the church situation.

Now, we still go to a Church of Christ, but it isn't anything like the ones we went to before. It's only the same nominally, which is enough to keep dh's family happy. We were so excited when we found this church because we were leaving all the legalism behind. But we picked up a new host of problems and that's when I began getting really frustrated. Churches as a whole, are bound to disappoint because they are made up of people and people are going to disappoint you. Additionally, I've discovered I really don't like preaching. I don't like the idea that someone is the expert and they're going to tell me what they think I need to hear. What do they know about my situation? This is especially true in churches like our's where only men can do the preaching. The preaching in our churches is usually about 45 minutes, which is way too long. My theory is that the reason the sermons are so long is that the preachers are all men and they've never had to sit through an entire service wondering if they started their period!

Hmmm. Wasn't this going to be a short history? Obviously, I had a lot of venting to do. As you can see, I have no real point. This post doesn't know where it's going because I don't know where I'm going. So, I'll just move on and leave you with my quiz results, which were suprisingly accurate. I don't know how it came up with a result, though, because I marked "I don't know" on about 1/3 of them it seems. Sigh.

You scored as Emergent/Postmodern. You are Emergent/Postmodern in your theology. You feel alienated from older forms of church, you don't think they connect to modern culture very well. No one knows the whole truth about God, and we have much to learn from each other, and so learning takes place in dialogue. Evangelism should take place in relationships rather than through crusades and altar-calls. People are interested in spirituality and want to ask questions, so the church should help them to do this.

Emergent/Postmodern

86%

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan

71%

Neo orthodox

64%

Charismatic/Pentecostal

54%

Modern Liberal

50%

Reformed Evangelical

43%

Classical Liberal

39%

Fundamentalist

36%

Roman Catholic

36%

What's your theological worldview?
created with QuizFarm.com

What is this thing we call summer?

2005-07-07T19:22:00.000-04:00

We all know teachers don't really get the summers off. First of all, we're not even paid. It's more like a forced 2 month lay-off. Secondly, we all end up doing other things. I had the AP workshop in June and then later this month I will start a two week class as part of a Department of Ed. grant program. I at least get paid for that.

In between those professional development opportunities, I do have some time to myself. The question is what to do with it. I'm wondering if any other teachers out there that feel the way I do. The way I see it, there are two ways of looking at summer vacation:

1. Try to get as much preparation for next school year done so that the year isn't quite so stressful. (Especially tempting since I am teaching a new course next year.)

2. Accept that no matter what you do, the school year is stressful. That's just the way teaching is. So, take two months to debrief, exhale, and try not to start the school year already burned out. You're not getting paid anyway!

At the beginning of the summer, I was definitely going with option 1. I planned out a schedule of what units I wanted to plan during each week and then promised myself I would stick to it even if I had to work nights and weekends. Now, I'm headed towards number 2. I'm feeling more like I should spend a few hours every day reading something that deals with the subject matter and then release myself to knitting, reading fiction, and shopping. I have several day trips I would like to make with friends or the dh and this is possibly our last summer in this area since dh is finishing up the dissertation. Why not take advantage of it?

Any of you fellow teachers have encouragement or admonitions? (Or non-teachers for that matter. What would YOU do if you had the summers "off"?)

UPDATE: Both posthipchick and Ms. Frizzle have posted recently about their summer schedules. It seems like I should find the balance between #1 and #2, but I have a little trouble. When I'm working, I wish I was playing and when I'm playing, I worry I should be working.

I'm back!

2005-07-06T22:52:00.000-04:00

We had a great time! I suspect that some year we won't -- that there will be an uncomfortable confrontation, or just a general "burn out" of going to the same place year after year, but that never happens. We had a blast and spent just long enough there that it felt good to come home. I think it is time for the vacation to end when everyone starts getting hurt. I had a blister from my flip flops (the only pair of shoes I wore the entire time) and a giant bruise on my leg from an inner-tube valve. I took pictures of the bruise for you. Watch for it soon. The dh got a rash from an unidentified plant on the golf course. Dad bruised his toes against one of the ride's walls. And we are all water-logged. In sum, it felt great to be there and great to come home.

The one image I will remember from this year's trip is my 8+ months pregnant sister in her pink maternity swimsuit, big floppy hat, floating lazily in the lagoon. She could only come for the day and couldn't ride any of the rides but insisted "I just want to get my butt in the water. I'm so hot!"

There was also some serious watergun activity. There always is, but this year was more than ever. There were alliances, spies, double agents, crying 5 year olds, mothers rolling on the grass during fireworks. One of my students has a shirt that says "It's only funny till someone gets hurt. Then it's hiliarious." This is the stuff summer is made of!

Schlitterbahn or bust!

2005-06-29T12:08:00.000-04:00

So I survived the AP U.S. History workshop. It was helpful, especially in providing resources and ideas. I wish we had spent a little more time on the exam itself. I don't plan to spend all year "teaching to the test" but let's face it -- the kids are taking this class instead of honors or standard because they want to place out. So, I think some time needs to be spent on testing strategy and that the curriculum should take the test content into consideration. It was a lot of work, and I was not paid for it, although my principal did cover the $1000 cost of taking the course and I receive graduate credit for it.

This week so far I've been plugging through American Colonies and making notes for future classes. All of this will cease tomorrow morning at 9 though, when we hop onboard our flight to Houston. My parents will meet us at the airport with two cars and we'll head straight to New Braunfels, Texas (well, we might stop at the Freebirds on 59 on our way out of town). I have spent almost every 4th of July since I was 4 in New Braunfels with my family. There are 30+ of us going this year. It is so much fun! We stay at the Schlitterbahn (German for water highway, I think) waterpark resort.

I know! I know! -- you are thinking "waterpark??" This is not your average waterpark. This puts all those crappy Six Flags and Disney World rides to shame. It is humongous -- you really couldn't ride every single ride in a day if you wanted. The old part of the park is fed with river water, straight from the Comal (which feeds into the Guadalupe). It is cold my friends! The resort is great for kids because there is no need for a locker or a picnic table. About noon when everyone gets cranky and hungry, we head back to our rooms to grab a bite and take a nap.

Can you tell I love this place?? I love this place so much that when my students annoy me and I tell them, "Be quiet. I'm going to my happy place," I honestly envision myself in an innertube floating through the rapids.

At night we sit on the balcony, play cards, and roast marshmallows.

I wait for this all year long! Before tomorrow, though, I still need to finish a few chapters...

Things that make me feel old:

2005-06-29T08:04:00.000-04:00

Last night I surfed around on nba.com to check on the draft. Antoine Wright, an Aggie, was selected fifteenth, which is the highest ever for an Aggie. Anyway, I read the bios of a few of the highest picks. They were all born in the mid to late-80's! This is crazy. Not only does it make me feel old, but also unaccomplished.

Day 4 of the workshop...

2005-06-23T23:59:00.000-04:00

Doesn't really matter. What matters is that two minutes ago the Spurs won the NBA championship. YAY! You might wonder why I am in the study typing instead of watching the celebration. As soon as the clock ran down I came in here. I told my husband to come get me AFTER the loser interviews. The thing is, I am very competitive but also very emotional. I get all excited when my team wins and then they interview the people from the losing team and I feel so bad for them. It's especially bad this year because Larry Brown is such a cool man. Did you know that Popovich had him over for dinner last night? And to top that off, Brown is sick and might not coach anymore! So, anyway, that's why I'm here, and not in front of the television.

GO SPURS GO!

Day 3

2005-06-22T22:26:00.000-04:00

Can't talk. Mind numb. Legs cramped from sitting hours upon hours crunched at table. Teeth rotting from candy and donuts (the only motivation).

Day 2 of the workshop...

2005-06-21T17:47:00.000-04:00

We've almost gotten through the activities listed for day 1. And of course, the time designated for groups to work together on their projects is always at the end of the day, so guess what gets cut short?

Sorry to be so cynical. Teachers are the hardest group to teach because we would all do it a different way -- our way.